Splatfests

Microwave
Garfield's team is Microwave, because Garfield is used to the inkling society's only cooking source; microwaves

Toaster Oven
Josh's team is Toaster Oven, because he's "a fucking gross hipster"

Cocaine
Garfield's team is Cocaine, because Garfield does not have a mouth and therefore cannot eat.
 * if cocaine win, gar gets lifetime supply of cocaine, and gets white rings around his nose and progressively gets more hyper as splat 3 progresses.

Snail
Josh's team is Snail, but josh does not like the taste of snails.
 * if snail wins, he wins a lifetime supply of snails, but doesnt eat them, and gets covered in snail slime as splatoon 3 progresses.

Incest
Garfield's team is Incest

Bestiality
Josh's team is Bestiality
 * this Splatfest does not have a plot changing ending, but we do learn afterwords Josh is dating a sea snail

Yes
Garfield's team is Yes
 * If Yes wins, the Salmonling Expansion is released.

No
Josh's team is No
 * If No wins, the Sea Snail Expansion is released, and josh's girlfriend just transforms into a humanoid shape.